Cabbage and Potato Pancakes

I’m having a bit of a cabbage week. It started well with the Chakchoukah, however, it’s gone downhill since then. Last night’s cabbage and potato pancakes were a bit of a flop.

It all started positively. I chopped some cabbage and potatoes and boiled them. This was straightforward and I was feeling very smug over my healthy meal. The next step was to mash the potato and mix it in a bowl with the cabbage, some flour and a couple of eggs…

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Well, how quickly this meal turned bad. For the past week or so I have not been eating gluten (I’ve been trying to see if it’s the cause of my stomach throwing a little hissy fit). Making this week’s shopping list and doing the shop itself was a bit of a rush. We go on Tuesdays to make use of the 10% student discount. Beyond shopping on this day, I also had work, a thirtieth birthday, and a drunken election night party/wake to attend. Of course, I had forgotten to make the list the night before and in my rush to do the shop before work  I didn’t read the recipe thoroughly. I missed that the dish required flour to create a batter with the eggs, binding the potatoes and cabbage. So we obliviously bought all the other ingredients needed, except for a gluten-free replacement for the flour.

J—– made it home just as I had finished boiling the cabbage and potatoes – the point at which I realised recipe needed flour. Just to add insult to injury, I had also just discovered that I had cooked far too much cabbage for the two of us. However, we were in far too deep to retreat. So I made an executive decision. We would add an extra egg. I do love eggs. I hoped that this would somehow hold everything together with the mashed potato when we spooned the mix into a frying pan and cooked it as small pancakes.

I was losing faith in this meal and J—- took over. Now J—- has made the meal a couple of times before. He hasn’t had the best luck in keeping the pancakes together, even with the flour. Maybe we weren’t making them small enough – perhaps they were too thick. In spite of this, previous attempts have resulted in some pretty good lumps of potato and cabbage that slightly resemble pancakes. Last night,however, I had created a pathetic mixture that even J—- couldn’t salvage. Each flip of an attempted pancake resulted in it breaking into irreparable pieces. Not one full pan of pancakes was cooked before the next big decision was made: we were going to turn the pancakes into a big mash mound. So ended the first pan of potato, cabbage and eggs and the next two pans followed in a similar manner.

 

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Our giant pile of mush

 

My favourite part of this dish is actually the condiments that go with it. We have a range we normally serve with the dish:

  • Mayonnaise
  • Sweet chilli sauce
  • Dijon mustard, oil and lemon
  • Sriracha
  • Balsamic vinegar

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But not even the Dijon mustard, oil and lemon (which is a sauce that should be put on everything) could save the mash mound. It was a terrible meal and made me a bit of a sulky monster. I’m a baby when it comes to food. When things go wrong, I need cheering up. And yes, this usually comes in the form of food. J—– is very good in managing my food craziness and escorted me to the supermarket to get chocolate. I needed endorphins, people. So off we went… and you know what… the night got worse… the supermarket was closed… we couldn’t get chocolate. Oh, my life!

I’m sorry for dragging you, the lovely reader, through this traumatic evening. This is my sob story and I believe it is indeed worthy of the last piece of brownie:

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